50 Barney Stinson Quotes from the Popular How I Met Your Mother Character

Barney Stinson quotes that will leave you smiling.

Barney Stinson is a fictional character played by Neil Patrick Harris on the show “How I Met Your Mother”. Barney is one of the five main characters on the popular show that ran for nine seasons starting from 2005.

Barney Stinson is the womanizer of the group of five friends whose lives the story follows. Based in Manhattan, New York, the series is based loosely on the two creators’ friendship when they lived in the city. Playing Barney Stinson, Neil Patrick Harris won two awards as Favorite TV Comedy Actor.

Don’t forget to also check out these Michael Scott quotes from The Office

Favorite Barney Stinson quotes

1. “When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.” – Barney Stinson

2. “Step one, you start running. There is no step two.” – Barney Stinson

3. “Look, our forefathers died for the ‘pursuit of happiness,’ okay? Not for the ‘sit around and wait of happiness.’ Now if you want, we can go to the same bar, drink the same beer, talk to the same people every day or you can lick the Liberty Bell. You can grab life by the crack and lick the crap out of it.” – Barney Stinson

4. “OK, here’s my thing —if gay guys start getting married, then suddenly the whole world’s gonna be doing it. That’s how it works: they start something, then six months later, everyone follows. Like…now everyone gets manicures.” – Barney Stinson

5. “Here’s the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my life.” – Barney Stinson

6. “It’s time to let go of the fantasies. It’s time to grow up.” – Barney Stinson

7. “Sometimes we search for one thing but discover another.” – Barney Stinson

8. “Settling down is for losers and kids who never go out anymore.” – Barney Stinson

9. “There are only a few truly great people on this planet and he is one of them.” – Barney Stinson

10. “Maybe it’s destiny?” – Barney Stinson

Barney Stinson Quotes About Love

11. “When I let a day go by without talking you….. That day is just no good.” – Barney Stinson

12. “I’VE GOT YOU, I DON’T NEED TO WAIT FOR IT ANYMORE.” – Barney Stinson

13. “Underneath those lies is one true thing. One true thing that can support the weight of all the lies in the world, and that the fact that I love you.” – Barney Stinson

14. “You are the love of my life. Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Forever.” – Barney Stinson

15. “Sometimes you fall for someone you didn’t expect, but that doesn’t make it wrong. Doesn’t everyone deserve to be happy?” – Barney Stinson

16. “Sorry about your eye. I’m available.” – Barney Stinson

17. “Hang on to this girl Ted – hang on and never let go.” – Barney Stinson

18. “For a long time, deep down I felt sort of, broken? But I don’t feel that way anymore.” – Barney Stinson

19. “I love everything about her, and I’m not a guy who says that lightly. I’m a guy who has faked love his entire life…” – Barney Stinson

20. “You and Marshall belong together. The two of you have something most people search their whole lives for and never find.” – Barney Stinson

Best Barney Stinson Quotes

21. “A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.” – Barney Stinson

22. “Ted, if you have a crazy story, I was there. It’s just a law of the universe.” – Barney Stinson

23. “Whatever you do in this life, it’s not legendary unless your friends are there to see it.” – Barney Stinson

24. “Do you have some puritanical hang up on prostitution? Dude, it’s the world’s oldest profession.” – Barney Stinson

25. “I wish men could have children on their own, like seahorses!” – Barney Stinson

26. “I’m going to like the way I look. I guarantee it.” – Barney Stinson

27. “I’m too far gone, I’m broken.” – Barney Stinson

28. “This, what you’re doing right now? I’m getting a De-rection.” – Barney Stinson

29. “Ah you’re exquisite; you must let me paint you.” – Barney Stinson

30. “People like being lied to. They just don’t like finding out they’ve been lied to.” – Barney Stinson

Bro Code Barney Stinson Quotes

31. “ARTICLE 2 A Bro is always entitled to do something stupid, as long as the rest of his Bros are all doing it.” – Barney Stinson

32. “ARTICLE 54 A Bro is required to go out with his Bros on St. Patty’s Day and other official Bro holidays, including Halloween, New Year’s Eve, and Desperation Day (February 13).” – Barney Stinson

33. “ARTICLE 85 “If a Bro buys a new car, he is required to pop the hood when showing it off to his Bros. COROLLARY: His Bros are required to whistle, even if they have no idea what they’re whistling at.” – Barney Stinson

34. ARTICLE 41″ A Bro never cries. EXCEPTIONS: Watching Field of Dreams, E.T., or a sports legend retire.” – Barney Stinson

35. ARTICLE 120 “A Bro always calls another Bro by his last name. EXCEPTION: If a Bro’s last name is also a racial epithet.” – Barney Stinson

36. ARTICLE 130 “If a Bro learns another Bro has been in a traffic accident, he must first ask what type of car he collided with and whether it got totaled before asking if his Bro is okay.” – Barney Stinson

37. “Think of me like Yoda, but instead of being little and green I wear suits and I’m awesome. I’m your bro—I’m Broda!” – Barney Stinson

38. Article 100: “When pulling up to a stoplight, a Bro lowers his window so that all might enjoy his music selection.” – Barney Stinson

39. “The Bro Code has been around for centuries. Nay, whatever’s more than centuries.” – Barney Stinson

40. “When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may position the brim at either 12 or 6 o’clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers and the handicapped.” – Barney Stinson

Hilarious Barney Stinson Quotes

41. “Yeah! I’ve Got A “Guy” Guy!” – Barney Stinson

42. “Don’t say you’re gonna kill someone in front of airport security. Not cool.” – Barney Stinson

43. “There are only two reasons to date a girl you’ve already dated. Breast. Implants.” – Barney Stinson

44. “One of the twenty-four similarities between girls and fish is that they’re both attracted to shiny objects. You really never read my blog, do you?” – Barney Stinson

45. “The killer in a horror movie does not stand in front of the camp cabins with a bullhorn and shout, ‘Attention, unguarded teens! At 3:00 I will jump out of that closet and hack you to death with a machete. By the way, my only weakness is fire.” – Barney Stinson

46. “I realized that I’m searching, searching for what I really want in life. And you know what? I have absolutely no idea what that is.” – Barney Stinson

47. “Every Halloween, I bring a spare costume, in case I strike out with the hottest girl at the party. That way, I have a second chance to make a first impression.” – Barney Stinson

48. “In my body, where the shame gland should be, there is a second awesome gland. True story.” – Barney Stinson

49. “You can grab life by the crack and lick the crap out of it!” – Barney Stinson

50. “Just…Ok?” – Barney Stinson

Which of these Barney Stinson Quotes is your favorite?

Barney Stinson is that friend who we probably all have at one time or another. He truly thinks he is awesome and that confidence helps him with women and life, even when he strikes out a time or two.

The show is actually told from the story of a flashback where the main character, Ted Mosby, tells his kids the story of how he met their mother. The time is supposed to be in 2030 and he is telling about events starting in 2005.

As great comedy characters are the key and as the quotes show, Barney Stinson is that confident, goofy, character that every good TV comedy needs to have. If you have not had a laugh in a while, give yourself a treat and tune in to meet Barney and his friends.

Did you enjoy these Barney Stinson quotes and lines? Which of the quotes is your favorite? Let us know in the comment section below.

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